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Chocolate Dairy Beverage

Ever have one of those days when things just coume out funny? How about when you aren`t drunk? I was at the the grocery store the other day with my wife and apparently i was acting dumb (as per usual). Wandering around, I saw Fudge Squirrels and ess-kar-Goats.

And those aren`t even the wierdest food sightings of the week.

Going to Canadian Tire on the weekend we see a sign out fron that says '' Check out our new food section''. When the hell did they start putting food into Canadian Tire??? Ok, fine, why not. As we get into the store and up the escalator there is a sign advertising 1L chocolate milks for 99 cents. I`m always up for cheap chocolate milk. The food section is craptastic, basically 3 aisles with chips, cookies, and other assorted junk food. We get to the dairy case, I reach in and grab a carton, and look at the lable: Chocolate Dairy Beverage. Huh? What?? Why the hell does it say that?? Who`s the dingbat that seemingly copyrighted the phrase Chocolate Milk. And who is the moron politician that rubber-stamped it?

That being said, I am enjoying my chocolate dairy beverage.

Also, if anyone knows where I can get a box of Dad`s Goody Ring cookies here in town, please let me know.

Friday Night Bowling

Tonight we were bored and had nothing to do. I started flipping through the "Entertainment" coupon book that we had and found some mini-golf passes. Michelle wasn't really up for that, but it did trigger a thought and she wanted to go bowling.

We eventually headed out and made the long trek to the alley (it's by our apartment that we aren't living in). Of course we got there and the place is packed. The guy running it came up to us as we walked in and informed us that it would be at least 9:00 before we could play since we didn't have a reservation. The bowling alley not being a fine dining establishment, we were unaware that it required reservations. Obviously we left.

Drove around for a while afterwards, no destination in particular. Got a quick bite to eat and then came back to the hotel. Been bored again ever since. At least now it is nearly sleep time. Maybe tomorrow will bring something better...

Bias of TSN

Gotta love TSN. It's nights like this that they truly earn the moniker of Toronto Sports Network. Seems they would rather send their TV trucks all the way down to Raleigh, N.C. to televise the Leafs-Canes game than have them make the relatively short jaunt up the 401 here to Ottawa for the Pens-Sens game.

To make some attempt to appease the masses that aren't brainwashed by the blue and white, they stick the Senators game on TSN2. With my current situation being as it is I am not able to GET TSN2, and thus am unable to see the game. Of course that may be just as well since I can only assume that they did the same as the previous 2 times this season that the Ottawa game was shown on TSN2 and merely put up the feed of the other team. Trying to watch the game with the opposing teams commentators is almost as bad as not watching the game at all.

But I`m sure they made the right decision. Ottawa is just surprisingly better than predicted (by some) this year, and Pittsburgh is only the reigning Stanley Cup Champions. A Toronto-Carolina game would have to be so much better than that right? That game would be chalk-full of drama, after all they are.....(rustles through the newspaper)....the WORST TEAMS IN THE LEAGUE?!?!?!???

Thanks TSN for nothing. I can`t wait to see how you try and screw up the football playoffs on Sunday....

Pyramid Schemes and Me

So it seems inevitable now that Michelle is going to be selling Avon. The whole thing reeks of a pyramid scheme. The girl signing Michelle up even said it basically was, except that she makes very little money from the pyramid part.

I hope it won't go too bad. I pressed the girl tonight on some of the details i was apprehensive about and it seems like my fears may have been unfounded.

Soon enough we'll have all kinds of Avon junk around here. Kinda takes me back to my childhood. Oh, those were simpler times...

Downtown

Living here in downtown Ottawa isn't so bad. I can walk to work every day, and there is lots of amenities nearby. Perhaps too many, Michelle seems to like going to them far too frequently for my tastes.

But I'll be glad to get back to my apartment once they get it all fixed up. The ETA for that is still after the new year, and last I heard they were still taking bids for the job.

God bless bureaucracy...

What am I doing here....

I don't know what I'm doing tonight. Pretty bored at the moment....

Maybe I should start posting things on here to get them off my mind...

God I hate the Penguins....

I want to see Sidney Crosby hit in the head with a snowshovel!!!!

I have a Blog?....

Oh yeah, i completely forgot about this place....

Maybe I'll start trying to post here again..........

T'was the night before Grey Cup.....

Twas the night before Grey Cup, and all through the Dome,

Not a creature was stirring, but the gophers back home.

The players were nestled and snug in their beds,

While visions of Grey Cup Rings danced in their heads.

When out on the field, there arose such a clatter,

Kent sprang from his bed to see what was the matter,

Away to his window, he flew like a flash,

Threw aside the Green Curtains, and Silky White Sash.

And what did he see with his wondering eye?

But a sea of Green Revelers and a furry brown guy.

“That looks like Dominguez, and Flick and Fantuz!”

“Its way after curfew! Do they want us to lose??”

So, out of his room and down to the field,

Coach Austin stormed out with a fury to wield.

As he went through the tunnel, the ground shook with a beat,

From the dancing and prancing of ten thousand feet.

“Hey Coach,” cried a voice, “Whatcha doing down here?”

It was Szarka and Schultz, and they were handing out beer!

Chucky and Chick were grilling up Dogs,

With Burgers being served by O’Day and the Hogs.

Crandall cooked Hot Wings, Joseph grilled steak,

While Cates, Holmes, and Hughes helped Makowsky serve cake.

“This is nuts!” Austin shouted, “It’s one-thirty AM!”

“I expected some revelry, but this is mayhem!”

Eric Tillman tapped Austin, “ You’re not Eagle Keys -”

“But I’m not Berry , or Gotta, or Gregory – so PLEASE!”

“You’re all waddling around here like Wascana geese!”

“And in need of a dance coach like Donald Narcisse.”

“Now, you’ve all had your fun, so back to your rooms.”

But then Austin ’s nose picked up the barbecue fumes.

Then Green Is The Color rang out through the air,

As Congi and Boreham played Banjos with flair.

On Davis , on Johnson, on Coach Ritchie Hall,

Even old Alex Smith flashed a smile after all,

On Lloyd, on McCullough, on Hunt and on Perry,

On Kornegay, Frazier, and yes, even Kerry.

The skydome then filled with a soft greenish glow,

And the whole Rider Nation set poised for a show.

An S and a wheat sheaf then formed in the air,

And a smile took the place of Coach Kent Austin’s glare.

Then everyone there, the players, the fans,

They formed a big circle by all holding hands,

Then right in the centre appeared the Grey Cup,

Which Fairholm and Ridgeway and Elgaard picked up.

They handed it over to Ritchie and Kent,

Who called Kerry and Eddie, and off the Cup went.

It was passed round the field, past heroes to present,

While Gainer dug holes for the Blue Bomber Pheasants.

That music was heard coast to coast people say

And they say Rider Pride grew three sizes that day.

Everyone left there dreaming of Blue Bomber doom.

And they sent all the Banjos to Troy Westwood’s Room.

GO RIDERS GO!

BRING HOME THE CUP!

Mystery Solved....

For those of you who have been keeping up with my blog (I won't kid myself, no one does....), I have finally solved the mystery of the Hockey News subscription. It was a gift for me for being in the wedding party at Jeff and Amanda's wedding. This was speculated by Michelle ever since I began questioning the origin of the subscription, but I continued to be oblivious for comedic effect.

The wedding itself was on Thanksgiving weekend. It was a nice ceremony with the only hiccups being the wacky weather and my pinning of Jeff's boutinere on the wrong lapel (sorry Jeff). The majority of the pictures were taken at the airport with Jeff's airplane and I am interested to see how they turn out.

The reception was fun and the food was excellent. My only complaint with it could be that it ended too early, but all in all it was still a great time.

Congrats Jeff and Amanda. I wish you a long and happy life together.

Uncle Murray

It seems that last week I became an uncle. Here are a few pictures of Jacob....

Eat it, Leafers....

Take THAT you stupid Leafs fans!!!! Heater can beat you at will, and you have 7 more years to see it!!!!!

Life Begins Again....

Tomorrow the new NHL season begins in earnest. And luckily it begins with what should be a thorough trouncing of the Maple Laffs by the Senators.

I cannot wait.

Strangest Dream Ever?

I'm not quite sure why, but I had the oddest dream last night.

In it, I was a pitcher for the Boston Red Sox and we were playing the New York Yankees.

It gets weirder.....

We were playing the first game ever on ice.

It gets even weirder.....

Not just any ice, we were playing on a glacier, the continental ice shelf.

It gets still weirder.....

The umpire was mad at me for throwing a pitch called a Spitfire.

And, possibly strangest of all:

One of the players for the Yankees that was hitting against me was John Candy. He character name was Ralph but the personality was that of Uncle Buck.

Pretty screwed up, huh?

Best weekend of the year

Without a doubt, this is the best weekend of the sporting year in Canada.

I am, of course, talking about the Labor Day Classic weekend in the CFL, the weekend when the biggest rivalries in the league are battled out.

Today saw the woeful Argos beat the snot out of the even worse Ti-Cats and the Stampeders defeat the Eskimos in the battle of the West Basement. Friday night had the Lions mutilating the Alouettes (no love lost there).

But, as usual, the game of the week was the 'Riders-Bombers game. This game has been a blowout the last few years. This year the Riders decided to keep it close, only to rip out the hearts of Bomber fans everywhere with an easy touchdown run in the dying seconds to secure the win.

And it'll be twice as sweet to watch them do it again next week back in Winnipeg in the rematch.

The mystery hockey news.

Last Monday I received an issue of the The Hockey News in the mail. It was addressed to me, but I never subscribed to it. According to the cover, it looks like it won't expire until next September. So some mystery benefactor has bestowed to me a years subscription.

Thank you masked stranger....

First place and it feels so good

Well, it took a lot longer tonight than originally planned, but the 'Riders are alone in first place in the CFL.

The hour long break at the start of the fourth quarter for the lightning storm seemed to be a blessing as the Green and White scored something like 12 unanswered points when play resumed while Edmonton could only manage one first down in that span.

The crowd was amazing!!! The skies opened up and lightning rang for an hour and there were still 15-20,000 fans in the stadium when play resumed. It was louder in the stadium after the hour long delay than most other stadiums are at any point.

A brilliant game and I know all Roughrider fans will go to bed happy tonight!!!

My good friend beer

Here I sit. Enjoying a beer and changing the channel between the 'Riders game and the Robocop marathon on the Space channel.

This has been a good night....

Bloggin' on the Balcony

Yup, this post is coming to you from the balcony outside my apartment.

Not much going on tonight. Michelle is watching her crappy dancing reality show on one TV while taping the same show on the other one. As a result, I am relegated to occupying myself on the computer.

And since I have already checked my usual websites at least five times in the last half hour I figured I may as well post something up here.

It's great out here on the balcony! I face the river so I can hear the peaceful sounds of the water. There's also few street lights around so I can see the stars better without the light pollution. There is a nice breeze keeping the bugs away and bringing by interesting aromas.

I think I'm gonna go and get a beer now and enjoy the evening out here....

Protesting the Protesters

Watching the news last night, I learned that there is a meeting coming up between the three North American Leaders in the coming week or so in this area. There was an information meeting for local residents and businesses regarding the security for the event. The local business owners are very concerned about their locations with regards to damage that could be caused by protesters. I have a huge problem with this.

Protesters have become a huge problem in our society. From what I have seen, all they do is gather at meetings of world leaders or policy shapers and cause havoc. They say that they have a cause, but that disappears when the vandalism of the surrounding areas starts.

Even when there protest remains relatively peaceful, there still has to be an enormous security contingent to deal with it should the situation decay into anarchy. And it is us, the taxpayers, who are forced to foot the bill for all this added security. It would be nice if these people who caused the need for it would pay something for it, but that isn't likely since the sheer fact they can sit around all day for a week to protest seems to indicate that they don't have (or don't want) a job.

And do these protests ever accomplish anything? Not that I've seen. People are always out protesting President Bush (and I'm sure that's why they'll be out at this meeting too) complaining to stop the war in Iraq and bring the soldiers home. The President's response: sent over even more soldiers for the Troop Surge. How's that working for you protesters?

All the leaders in North America have shown that they don't give a damn about whatever is the protest-du-jour. The only time it is ever brought up is by opposition parties to try and put pressure on the leader. In fact, I'm sure that if the Secret Service agents hadn't stopped him, President Bush would have jumped into a tank and gone all Tiananmen Square on their asses by now (and probably on more than one occasion).

All these protesters sit around with their signs and their songs and think that they are changing the world. If they really wanted to change the world, they would go and make something of their lives and actually be a part of that change.

Don't demand a solution. Be a part of the solution.

Let's do the Time Warp

Last night Michelle wanted to watch the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show' and I figured it would be good to see it at least once in my life, if for no other reason than to get all the references to it in shows like The Simpsons and Family guy.

It was a pretty screwed up movie. Michelle told me that it was originally a play, after which I began comparing it to 'Springtime for Hitler', the play that is put on in 'The Producers' when they are trying to produce a flop.

And during the whole movie, I kept going back the the episode of 'The Drew Carey Show' where they have the giant dance number to the Time Warp with the main characters dressed up like the movie. That was freakin' hilarious.